Swings & Roundabouts

..or you can call it “How The Scattered Families in Year 2010 Celebrate Big Days”. Or even something unflattering, which I would get from trolls if I have any.

Anyways, my sunbeam of a daughter turned two on Wednesday. Cue screams and gasps. Hard to believe that two years have sped by. She is such a chatty little soul that you’d rarely find her sitting quietly in one place. She is full of energy, forever running from one room to another, spreading havoc hither and thither. She has the uncanny ability to attract people’s attention where ever she goes. The library where I take her weekly, buses, the shops that are teeming with people, you name it, she gets a fan in under two minutes.

As her birthday fell on a weekday, we hadn’t planned of anything apart from a mini cake-cutting with just us four, followed by a trip to the desi zones of East London, to the temple and thence to Saravana Bhavan. This was, of course, before her highly enterprising maami got into the act.

My little girl shares her birthday with her maama, a fact that tickles us greatly, as he was the biggest monkey around while growing up. Last year, mid-way through his wedding celebrations, maama and niece cut this truly awesome cake together. This year, with us in England and maama in California, we did not even consider joint celebrations. But the aforementioned enterprising maami got on the phone to us and mom the previous evening and said that we can still cut the cake together – with a modern tweak, that’s all.

So, when it was midnight in California, 8.00 AM in England and 12.30 PM in India, we all gathered in front of a webcam-ed computer. The Mintlet cut her almond cake, maama in California cut the chocolate cake his wife lovingly made while dissonant voices from all over the world sang “Happy Birthday” lustily.

We scoffed the cakes, Pratik lusted after the chocolate cake, The Mint tripped and fell down, got up and stuffed her face with more cake while six people talked over one another via the Internet.

Now, that’s the modern way to celebrate. Innit?

So…. day 2 of quota of 31 days to up my blog to stratospheric heights and already it has got me depressed. After day 1, I realise I have got dibs on little bits of everything but need something to pull it all together under one biggish sized hat. I did spend lots of time on this last night and have a vague inkling of what needs to be done.

And so, hey! List post. Now, list posts are supposed to be real good cos according to the visitor stats, people flock to click on links that scream “5 reasons why I’d love to deck you” and “How to deck the scheming former pal” rather than one that is titled “My friend is a sod”.

Right now, my head is chock full of things I need to do before I can jet off to Chennai on Friday so let me list them out here.

1. Finish the template related work for the updating of my friend’s site that I have been working on for the past couple of weeks. Though new, this site has really taken off and I am panicking that I bring the whole thing crashing down. Also, I haven’t worked with Joomla since graduating and that is taking a bit of getting used to, as well.

2. Complete the article I am researching and writing on the unemployability crisis and related issues in India. After a long time, I am visiting various sites to dig out the stats to formulate and substantiate my theories.

3. Finish packing – this is a never-ending job as each time I grab things that need to make their way to Chennai with us, my daughter follows me, picks up the same things and scatters them all over the house. I also need to go shopping to buy some last minute must grabs.

4. Put the kitchen to right. It is okay now but I want to make sure it is easy for the spouse to get cooking.

5. I would also like to make some basic stuff like idli batter and so on, just to make life easy the first weekend.

6. Wax.

7. Paint my nails.

I start my 31 Days to Build a Better Blog today, following the impressive Darren Rowse’s 31DBBB principles. For the very first day, Darren suggests one to write an Elevator Pitch. As Darren says, “If you’re fuzzy on what your blog is about it’s unlikely than anyone else will have much of an idea either.”

So this is a good time for me to crystallise in my mind what my blog is all about and put it in as few words as possible.

After killing many brain cells, I realised something vital. I do not have an elevator pitch for my blog. Why? Because I write about anything that strikes my fancy so I do not have a single niche. Much as I have spun off my recipes etc into a separate food blog, what remains here is still not vertical enough.

So before I write an elevator pitch to sell my blog, I need to get more vertical.

Tomorrow: Write a List Post

It is late and I am working on a project for a friend while googling for stats for an article for another company – but I can’t help listening with half an ear to the spouse’s weekly desi news catch-up. Sify.com’s “news” is going on at the mo and the girl wielding the microphone is getting on my nerves big time. The fake accent, the way she keeps saying “McDonnals” and the language! Maybe I have been living in England for way too long so I don’t know when it became hip to throw a few “hell”s on television. Blaspheming aside, what ever is “raved up”?

While you are at it, how would you “catch up with a watermelon juice”? Is Watermelon Juice a person? And something else is labelled as tasting “very well”.

ARGH!

Before I ram a pen in my ear to relieve me of my misery, let me shout: I am going to Chennai! Yep! After much suspense, the babus at High Commission, London came through (just like you predicted, CA!) and I successfully applied for my visa and booked my tickets. And Saturday morning shall find me sipping my grandma’s piping hot kapi. As I aim to be there for a month or so, I have decided to do two things 30 days related.

To keep my blog chugging along, I have decided to do my 31DBBB (or Darren Rowse’s 31 Days to Build a Better Blog). I participated in this challenge when Darren first launched it and I think it will do self and blog a great deal of good, give the blog kind of an overhaul.

One thing I am going to really miss is my Body Combat. To combat (ha ha) that, I am going to be doing Jillian Michaels’ 30 day Shred whilst trusting in Rujuta Diwekar to help my eating in check. Though her bambaiyya language will drive me nuts well before week 1, I am hoping I will be ably distracted and can stop myself from poking me in my eye.

When did speaking bad English become so fashionable anyway? On national television and published books, no less!

Answer: WHY?

If Katie Holmes herself, as buffed and polished as they come, looks like Hollywood’s version of a hag, what chance do us mere mortals have? And more to the point, why ever would we want to know how we look when we are OLDER? Isn’t this a case of ridiculous marketing? Or, by making sure it grabbed my attention, they have proved their strategy? Go figure.

I am still not sold on the service, btw!

..as to why this blog went all quiet for a while. Right? Well, the usual thing happened – I lost my writing mojo. I hit a blank wall and just couldn’t get over it. Writing anything became a huge drag. There were so many things in my head that I wanted to put down on paper but somehow my voice was gone. And I didn’t know how to get it back.

So I just wallowed. A lot. And then some.

But I missed the joy I got out of writing. I was desperate to get it back but I was clueless how. The more I didn’t write, the more scared I got – that I can’t write anymore, that I had never written well enough anyway to make a fuss now etc.

So I started reading – reading blogs on writing, on copywriting, on blogging, on Social Media. Oh and I also got into Julia Quinn in a big way. A friend convinced me that her Regency romances are quite good and since I am a sucker for period English, I borrowed the books from the library. That led to some interesting confusion, considering I live in England – I used to get so immersed in the book and then there will be a reference to a spot I know well. And I’ll go “oh I was there last week!” Interesting times!

I also participated in a Tweetchat with Beth Schillaci about becoming a better blogger and using blogs more effectively. One of my queries was regarding niches, to which Beth replied “A niche allows you to focus your blog more easily. For business blog, stick with your business niche…. People with tighter niches tend to do better with attracting audience and advertisers.”

That was one of my problems. I had varied interests and had them all under one roof. Well they were under different roofs but I brought them under one to have better control over them. But they were counter-productive as I lost my focus. So the first thing I did that evening was to split my site into my regular blog and a separate food blog.

But this still didn’t end my writing block.

And then I came across this – and the penny dropped. So I started writing. Just writing. Most of it was plain rubbish but at least I was writing. As I wrote more and more, I felt I was climbing back from the void. There is still a’ways to go but I feel like I have crossed the main part.

Now that I have spun off my food blog, I am going to be making more of a focussed approach to this one too. Being a parent colours my thinking a lot. So I decided to play to my strengths and decided to go with introducing a “child-friendly / child-safe” theme to my blog. To that effect, I have also asked some of the better mommy bloggers out there to guest post here.

So starting with Monday, you will find some exciting things happening here. Kiran Manral, the fantastic writer behind Karmic Kids and the brain of the charity organisation India Helps, is kicking things off here. I shall sign off here today, adding a huge thank you to my loyal readers. You rock!

Before I go any further, let me plug the lovely e-book the ladies at Indusladies.com are bringing out to mark the occasion. The e-book is supposed to be an, I quote, “elegant list of all Indian Mommy Bloggers”, that will be sent to all the members of Indusladies.com as well as their Facebook & Twitter followers. What a lovely idea, ladies!

So, dear reader, please link up, join in and spread the word.

And so, to Mother’s Day. There’s something I would like to discuss with you, my readers, on the subject of Mother’s Day and in particular, what makes a perfect gift. It is usual for mums to get flowers, chocolates and the like as loving tokens of appreciation from their children and their father, to mark this special day. In the UK, after Valentine’s Day, it is the busiest day in a restaurant’s calendar. So the eateries around the town go all out to make sure it is their restaurant that is chosen as the ideal place to treat your mom to lunch on Mother’s Day.

My son gave me a lovely gift for Mother’s Day this year – all the more special because the thought was 100% his and so was most of the execution. He decided that he will get me breakfast in bed! So well before the day, he got my “breakfast order” from me and wrote it on the kitchen calendar so he wouldn’t forget it! It was so lovely to see him buzzing around, determined to make it special. He plans to do the same for his dad, for Father’s Day too!

Speaking from personal experience, no mum can hold out against that kind of an experience. So if any one out there hasn’t got a clue what to get for their mums for this Mother’s Day, take a leaf out of my son’s book and wow her! Satisfaction guaranteed!

Beyond all this, the teddy bears and chocolates and flowers and meals in or out, I tell you what a mother would really appreciate. Time. For herself. Time when she can concentrate on herself. Time when she can BE herself. This can take the form of a salon coupon for a pampering day out for your mum. Or simply, some time to call her own, when she doesn’t have to pick up after the children or rush around doing chores. No answering the telephone, no “Mum, where’s the juice?”, just some peace and quiet. Not much to ask for, right?

In fact, you can run with that thought and make a simple, handmade ‘coupon’ booklet she can cash in during the year to get some “me time”. Each voucher can have different time values – from 15 minutes to a day / weekend off to do non-mum things that she wants. And, by making sure it is valid for a year, you are telling your mum that she is special not just on Mother’s Day but the rest of the year too! Won’t she be tickled?

So go on, give your mum the best gift ever this Mother’s Day – the gift of time!

… quite a good one, thanks very much!

Why? Mainly because it was spent lazing at home, my favourite way to spend a weekend. Oh and proof of how desperately I need to get out more? The abundant 17 degree sunshine made me giddy with happiness – cos I could now hang my washing out to dry! No more slowly drying, mouldy smelling smalls and bigs scattered all over the house! No more laundry baskets in perpetual stage of fullness. Wa-hey!
Repeat after me: I need to get out more!
Rest of the weekend was spent in making yummy food – one-pot delish of sambhar sadam with mixed veg coupled with cuke raita on Saturday and rotis with dal fry and mushroom and pea curry on Sunday. YUMMO, if I say so myself!
The best part of the weekend? Microwavable quick eats in the form of carrot halwa on Saturday night. It took a grand total of 15 minutes from grating to ending up as glistening morsels of scrumptiousness on my plate and if that didn’t make it sweet, nothing else will.
Icing on the cake was the super match played by the Chennai Super Kings. All the way to the semi-final now, baby!
Wasn’t that a good weekend? Hmm?

When there is a Twitter hashtag “livetweetingabortion” you know something’s very wrong somewhere. A 27-year old American mum-of-one has come under fire for using social media to chronicle the progress of her abortion. On Twitter and YouTube, Angie Jackson gave gory details as she aborted her three-week-old foetus, due to health reasons.

Even as I typed the first two sentences of this post, it felt surreal. Going on Twitter and writing about your body expelling your foetus seemed nothing short of barbaric. I don’t know what the mum’s intentions are for doing this, what she hopes to achieve but my mind simply boggles.

A few months back, a mum got major flack for tweeting about her son’s accidental death as he fell into the pool. I didn’t see anything odd in that as I felt she was just reaching out to some support in her time of grief. But in this case?

A case of social networking gone awry, methinks.