The Absense of Good Desi Chick Lit

We have a mini-library of sorts in my team, at work. Well, mini-library seems a rather grand way of describing what it is, a collection of books, but we take it very seriously – we even have a librarian to monitor the traffic! Most of the books in this collection are light, even frivolous read – none of the blood chilling or brain workout-y type of books I’d like to get my teeth into, so I generally
stay away from it.

But one day, a random thought struck me and I actually went through these books. Most of them were written by women and covered subjects such as shopping, clothes, dating, partying, drinking, sex… ‘chick lit’, as I describe it. Not that I have anything against such things, I even borrowed one such book when the library was shut. As I was reading all about three enterprising women and their ideas to nab themselves a dishy guy, I couldn’t help wondering how come we have no such books in the desi market.

How come us desis girls don’t muck about such light material? Lord knows we could tell the world a thing or two. How tough it is to walk past a crowd of roadside romeos without batting an eyelid; how to cross the road opposite Ethiraj College (in Chennai) without getting run over by blokes driving outsized bikes; how to go on a date without grandparents and assorted relatives spotting you around the countryside. There’s also the intriguing life of upstairs-wali Mallika and her shenanigans, the old boy next-door and what he gets upto when maami goes to the market, Flat Association President mama who makes sheep eyes at Lily aunty’s cleavage at the committee meetings… well, you get my drift?

Why is it that the desi literature scene so heavy? Is it because us desis cannot read chick lit or anything half so flimsy? Do we need meaty subjects all the time? Why? Why can’t we kick back with the tale of Meena and Seema as they try to plot their way around their workplace, trying to get past the letch Mohan or Ammu, as she tries to solve the mystery of who-put-the-salt-in-the-soup-and-ruined-her-dinner-party?

I say the desi lit world needs some input from the likes of us Desi Chicks. The Jhumpa Lahiris, Arundhathi Roys and Kiran Desais can have their hard core, heavy works but we need some fresh, new blood from some regular Janes too.

What say my gal pals?

Madras, namma Madras!

In the past few weeks, quite a few people have written something about my hometown be it their brush with the humidity and the pollution or how diametrically opposite it is to the North Indian cities, such as Delhi. Reading about these have made me quite home sick for my lovely city and I thought I shall put pen to paper and write about what makes me love it so.

Chennai, or Madras as it was known then and familiar to me today, has always been the perfect amalgamation of the old and the new. It is a city, where the kancheevaram sarees and old maamis live hand-in-hand with the Mocha coffee swigging, tank topped teeny-bopper. It is a city where the December Music Season is the highlight of the year’s cultural calender. But it is also the city where multi-stored malls and ginormous technology parks are coming up at an alarming pace. Kapaleeshwarar Temple still holds sway while Dublin continues to rock the party, come Saturday night.

The old and the new have meshed together so well that one barely leaves a dent on another. The Geetha cafes and Saravana Bhavan clientele still continue going about their daily toils, the latest opening of Baristas notwithstanding. Pizza Hut still has a mile long seating queue outside its premises most evenings and the latest branch of Madurai Idli Kadai just a little over a mile away doesn’t put any pro-Italianos off their stride.

It is also a city of crazy traffic and diabolical drivers. Having a countdown at the traffic lights seems to have made these speed demons crazier than before, what with all the revving that happens even when the timer has a good 20 seconds to go! Latest model Honda Civics aside, the potholes the latest bout of rains have gifted to the repaved roads will give your bones a workout no Shiatsu massage ever will.

It is also the city where the humidity hits you like a wet blanket the minute you set foot in. The sweat running in rivulets, combining with the dust and grime will make you look rather like an Indian brave by the end of the day. If you are not used to it, it may well make you weep!

Though Tamil is the language of the state and the DMK fervour had made sure that there is a bit of ziddi in speaking the language, the people are not averse to learning a new language. Proof of this would be the hugely popular language programmes run by the Alliance Francaise and Max Muller Bhavan, which teach French and German, respectively. But this trait is not to be found solely amongst the younger generation. My old vegetable vendor used to speak in highly fractured but extremely serviceable Hindi to one of my neighbours, who had moved to Chennai from Bombay a few years back. Though the lady had been a resident of the city for about 3 years then, she hadn’t picked up a word of the local language while the wizened vendor knew enough to sell her bhindi and baingan on demand!

Chennai, the city, is split into many zones, depending on its population. Accordlingly, in Sowkarpet, you will find Sindhis and Marwaris whilst in Parrys Corner,you will find lot more Telugus than Tamils. (Aside: Though the Sindhis and Marwaris have settled in the city and generations of their families have been calling Chennai home, none of them could speak a word of Tamil amongst them. This was a highly irritating factor during my college days. )
Eastern Madras is full of the brahmins whilst the South has folks connected to tinsel-town.

Though the city is now expanding in all directions at break neck speed and once shunned areas such as Velachery and Virugambakkam are now extremely sought after, the old demarkations still exist. The new perimeters haven’t erased the old they have simply, in typical Chennai fashion, become a part of the fabric.

It is also the city where education is supreme. Every year, during admission time, you will find anxious mums and dads queuing outside the city’s top schools, just to get an application form. The streets will be bereft of children come evening, as they will all be busy at the abacus classes, trying to master that ancient art, before taking off to the Bharatnatyam or singing classes. It is the same city where John Britto and Swingers dance schools flourish, helping wannabe Prabhu Devas turn their dreams into reality.

This is also the city where NIFT sits comfortably next to Co-Optex showroom. The city where the latest fashion trend is a saree with a pocket for one’s cell phone. The city where heels come with butti patterns to match the pallus. The city where hipsters jeans are worn with a zari top. This is the city where the paati’s Annamacharya keertans jostle for space with grand daughter’s James Blunt.

That is the magic of my city a city where the roads are full of potholes, the traffic snarls legendary, the water problem one of epic proportions, where sabhas are as important as the multiplexes but one in which a person can go for a spot of masala dosa and milkshake at mdnight, on the way back from a disco or a pizza and fresh juice for high tea, before joining the pattu saree maamis at Music Academy for a K J Yesudas kutcheri. A city where aalaapana and Air Nikes exist comfortably.

This is Madras, nalla Madras. We are like this only, saar!

It's Time to Stop Being the Victim

Less than twenty-four hours after the first blast and the mud-slinging has started. All the political bigwigs are at it again – pointing fingers at everyone else and trying to pin the blame on someone for yesterday’s atrocious acts of violence and murder.

For that is what is was – cold-blooded, calculated mass murder of innocents who did nothing but take that particular train for their journey home. Home to their children, parents, pets – but never got there. Hundreds of lives were rudely cut off because some fanatics got it into their heads that they would kill, maim and murder some innocent people of Mumbai. Why? Just ‘cos they could do it! In the name of God, religion, righteous beliefs – nah! This is about power and nothing else. Everything else is a front, a façade to give their ‘image’ a boost.

Saddened though I am by yesterday’s happenings, the chief emotion in my heart, that fills my very being now, is anger. Anger that this has been done to our people again! Lots of talks in the media about the blasts of 1993, more recently the IIS-B attacks – what is the point? What has been done since then to a. prevent such an event from occuring again b. form an effective emergency services in the form of police, ambulance and fire services?

One word – zilch!

All the news clips that have been shown till now have images of people lying broken and bleeding and police officers strutting about the place, talking to media. Nowhere did I see an EMT tending to the wounded or an ambulance speeding away. But there were lots of pictures of the general public lending not just a solitary helping hand but jumping headlong into rescuing trapped survivors. (Aside: Readers’ Digest – is this the rudest city? May be they didn’t hold doors but they came to their fellowmen’s aid when it was needed. Now put that in your pipe and smoke it!)

Will our so-called leaders ever learn? Will they stop looting the country and stuffing their pockets and actually do something good for the country? I was reading a book the other day, which was set in Mali, Africa. The country’s economy is described to have been ‘raped’ by the powers that be, that the poor are languishing in the streets. Well, that may not be the scenario in India (not completely – yet!), our country’s prospering at a rapid clip inspite of the buffoons that claim to run it. If a country can do so well inspite of our bevy of corrupt politicians and officials, how well can it do if we actually cleanse our systems of them?

This might be a load of baloney but something has to be done. We cannot be bombed in our homes, trains, roads at any time of day or night and carry on doing what we were doing before that, for ever. Like Sukhi’s famous line from Rang De Basanti, ‘even an ant reacts if you step on it, but we don’t’.

True enough!

It is time we reacted. We have been targets, victims long enough.

It’s time.